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Author Topic: Breast Cancer hits close to home  (Read 3015 times)
rv_safetyman
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« on: March 14, 2011, 05:09:32 PM »

If you read this post, you will see why I am posting it here in the hopes that it gets the best exposure.  Hopefully the moderators will let it stay here for a few days.

I am writing to this group, since many of you have daughters in the 40-50 year age group, some are married to ladies in the same age group and some of you wonderful ladies may fall in the same group.  What I am about to write could save a life or two.

As most of you know, the medical community has proposed that women under the age of 50 years, with no family history can (should?) forgo mammograms.  I looked at the National Cancer Institute and it still recommends 40 years old as the base age:

http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/detection/mammograms

PLEASE DO NOT FOLLOW THE PROPOSED 50 YEAR AGE RECOMMENDATION!!  LADIES, PLEASE GET YOUR YEARLY MAMMOGRAMS!!!

Friday, our 42 year old daughter, Kelly, was diagnosed with breast cancer!!!  She is healthy, eats properly, is not overweight, has never smoked, etc.  We do not have a family history of cancer.  Last week she went in for her yearly mammogram.  They called her for a second test a couple of days later and then did a biopsy last Thursday.  Friday she was informed that the biopsy was positive.

We are very strong family (three daughters, three wonderful SILs, and eight great grandkids).  We will all support Kelly, her husband, and two precious daughters (5 and 7).  We are fortunate that Lisa, our oldest daughter, is a clinical dietitian at University Hospital here in Denver and she has arranged for Kelly's case to be reviewed by the well regarded team at the Breast Cancer Clinic.

The very preliminary indication is that the mammogram detected the tumor early and the prognosis will be good.

I will detail her journey in our blog listed in our signature.

Jim
« Last Edit: March 14, 2011, 05:14:08 PM by rv_safetyman » Logged

Jim Shepherd
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« Reply #1 on: March 14, 2011, 05:31:06 PM »

Jim, we are holding a positive thought for Kelly and your entire family.

-Sean and Louise
http://OurOdyssey.BlogSpot.com
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« Reply #2 on: March 14, 2011, 05:46:07 PM »

Jim & Pat,
Our prayers are for your strength & Kelly to be getting better without surgery or anything but the good lord making her well and cancer free.  We are so sorry to hear about this, Keep us all informed of her progress and the day she is called, (Miracle, Cancer Free).  It can happen and we pray it will in the case of your daughter.

Gary
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« Reply #3 on: March 14, 2011, 05:52:25 PM »

Jim,
    We are so sorry to hear about Kelly. We will her and all your family to our prayer list.  Jack
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« Reply #4 on: March 14, 2011, 05:57:35 PM »

Jim:

This is certainly not good news for your family! But it sounds like they got it in time.

My Mom had breast cancer 19 years ago. It was not caught in time before it spread. She lost one breast and 19 lymph nodes. Then it went to her brain. Suddenly we were talking to a 5-year-old girl. But a storm of prayer was elevated for her. She recovered her memory 100%, and is still alive today at 81, thank the good Lord!

Be blessed!
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« Reply #5 on: March 14, 2011, 10:04:44 PM »

Breast Cancer is not only for women, My dad just had a mass removed from his chest that was first thought to be cancer, the results are not back in yet but the doctor removing it was confident it is not cancerous.

Sorry to hear about your daughter.
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« Reply #6 on: March 14, 2011, 10:20:11 PM »

Boy, this is a tough one. Im sorry to hear about your daughter, her and your family are in my prayers as is Charley and Mex-Nut. Be very thankful they caught the beast early. That is the most important thing and why mamograms are so important. My mom found a lump and "put her head in the sand" I guess she was hoping it would just go away if she ignored it. Of course it did not! She had a partial breast removed and then went on chemo and stuff. The doc swore up and down it was gone and she did not have cancer anymore..... within about a year though it was back and in her bones. She is stage 4 (uncurable) and she was given less then a year to live, it was extremely painful (probably the most painful way imaginable to die). She had broken ribs and all kinds of stuff, it was bad. But they now have the pain controlled with a patch that gets changed every 3rd day and she takes a pill everyday and once a month she has IV type injections of a new miracle drug called zometex (sp?) and gets blood tests once a month. She will have to do this for the rest of her life, but as long as she does it her life can be prolonged for years.... she doesnt have the same "quality" of life, but it is WAYYYYY better then she would have in a coffin! Cancer is an awful beast that really needs to be slain, right now the best way to do that is by catching it early.
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« Reply #7 on: March 14, 2011, 10:43:22 PM »

I am sorry to hear that about your daughter. My wife worked in the hospital for many years, and on a check up, she had a small lump, so she immediately took care of it  with aggressive surgery. That was 4 years ago, and she has had treatements every six months, several medications, and i believe has had four reconstrucive surgeries and has just finished her last one last week.  She still has 2 more semi annual check ups, and she is done with that and the meds. Like the original post, women and us guys also need to have regular check ups.   So thanks for your posts as this is so important.
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« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2011, 03:44:55 AM »

My prayers are with your family. Sounds like they got it in time. My grandma had it about 15 years ago and she has been cancer free since then and she will be 95 this month.
I would just urge you to continue to ask the Lord to keep your faith stong thru this and not fall into that pink ribbon foolishness. I know I may get flamed for that but I don't think wearing ribbons ever solved any problem. It also makes one wonder as you drive along the interstate and see all of these medical research buildings as to what they do in there all day. Simple, they sit around and think of ways to raise money to build more of those buildings. I love how they say they are this close to finding a cure for some such disease but we need more money. I've heard that forever and nothing changes.
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« Reply #9 on: March 15, 2011, 05:35:53 AM »

My sister is a breast cancer survivor.  Almost 20 years ago, in her early 30's, a quite aggressive type and with surgery and therapy no signs at all now.  Take heart that your daughter will have the same success!

Crabby - yeah, you should get flamed.  Your God may want you to pray for a cure and that's fine, but I expect he also thinks people should work for it, not sit around and wait for it to all on their heads from on high.  Behind the "pink ribbon" you dismiss so arrogantly is a chain of donation, fund-raising and incredibly dedicated people working to find cures, and given the number of honest survivors of cancer including those mentioned in this thread, succeeding in finding some of them!

Remember the parable of the lottery ticket - "Oh God, I've prayed to you to let me win the lottery - why have you abandoned me so that I do not win"  "I've been waiting for you to buy a lottery ticket!"


Brian



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« Reply #10 on: March 15, 2011, 05:44:35 AM »

Jim & Pat

My thoughts and Prayers are with you and your girls.

You know how us Dads with 3 Daughters are.

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Sonnie & Lil-Bit
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« Reply #11 on: March 15, 2011, 06:08:40 AM »

I was just being pragmatic so I can take being blasted. If you want to wear a ribbon and give money to the cancer society go ahead. I just wonder how much of the money goes toward actual research that's all.
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« Reply #12 on: March 15, 2011, 06:11:41 AM »

Jim Pat and Family. Lin and I have you in our thoughts and prayers. If you need anything We are a phone call away.

God Bless
Wayne
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rv_safetyman
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« Reply #13 on: March 15, 2011, 06:17:32 AM »

Thanks for the all the kind words.

PLEASE don't let this thread turn "political".  That would drive a knife in an already bleeding heart. 

My intention was to motivate women to get mammograms.  As has been pointed out, men should be aware of the potential as well.

We are getting wrist bands for the family, because we all feel so helpless and we want to show support for Kelly and her family.

Jim
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Jim Shepherd
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« Reply #14 on: March 15, 2011, 06:26:11 AM »

Jim, we will keep Kelly and family in our thoughts and prayers. GB

 Van & Cheryl
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« Reply #15 on: March 15, 2011, 06:37:58 AM »

Our thoughts and prayers to you and yours. M&C
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« Reply #16 on: March 15, 2011, 06:46:09 AM »

Jim, as a father of 4 daughters my heart bleeds for you,Kelly and the family have a tough road ahead lean on each other and draw courage from each other.
I never know what to say when it comes to things like this but this post is just to painful for me to read even after 16 years has passed so I won't be back some day I'll explain to you but hoping for the very best outcome for your family  
  


God Bless
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« Reply #17 on: March 15, 2011, 07:44:47 AM »



Jim  my family 's prayers are with you.

Been there with my baby daughter. She is now five years cancer free.

One year of chemo. and radiation treatments.

Some of the worst years of my life. but some of the best also, when thing get better. I think we got a lot closer because of it. When you think you might lose something you know what you have.

uncle ned
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« Reply #18 on: March 15, 2011, 08:20:24 AM »

My prayers are with your family. Sounds like they got it in time. My grandma had it about 15 years ago and she has been cancer free since then and she will be 95 this month.
I would just urge you to continue to ask the Lord to keep your faith stong thru this and not fall into that pink ribbon foolishness. I know I may get flamed for that but I don't think wearing ribbons ever solved any problem. It also makes one wonder as you drive along the interstate and see all of these medical research buildings as to what they do in there all day. Simple, they sit around and think of ways to raise money to build more of those buildings. I love how they say they are this close to finding a cure for some such disease but we need more money. I've heard that forever and nothing changes.

Ain't that the truth!  And deservedly.
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« Reply #19 on: March 15, 2011, 08:27:38 AM »

Jim:
Best of luck to your daughter. I have one the same age, in similar good health otherwise. This would drive me and most fathers right up to the edge.
I worked for 40 years for the American Cancer Society. We are conservative in our issuance of guidelines. We still call for screening mammograms for asymptomatic women aged 40 and up. There are some medical economists out there that say since most breast cancers are found in older women that starting at age 40 is a waste. However, we all know that if our daughter, wife, sister catches an early breast cancer in their 40s and their lives are saved, who cares about the larger demographics and economics?
Here's a link to ACS guidelines for mammography, similar to those of the NCI to which Jim refers:
http://www.cancer.org/Treatment/UnderstandingYourDiagnosis/ExamsandTestDescriptions/MammogramsandOtherBreastImagingProcedures/mammograms-and-other-breast-imaging-procedures-screening-mammogram
Once again, Jim, our thoughts and prayers are with you, your daughter and the whole familey.
Mike in GA
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« Reply #20 on: March 15, 2011, 08:33:40 AM »

Jim,

Thank you for letting us know. That is so sad! I will be praying for her. Nobody, in our family, has had to go through something like that, so I don't even know what to say....

However, I will be praying.

God bless,

John
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« Reply #21 on: March 15, 2011, 09:34:13 AM »

Folks, I did not post this thread in an effort to generate all of these amazing responses.  

My goal was to reinforce that the ladies need to do everything in their power to fight against this terrible disease.  I received an amazing email from a Eagle International member who developed breast cancer at ****25 years of age****.  

As Molly, Kelly's youngest daughter, said:  "Dad your eyes have sprung a leak".  Well folks, Pat and I have had a lot of leaks in the past few days and when we read your comments, the leak really got worse.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS!!!

Now ladies, wives, daughters:  Call and make that appointment!!!

Jim
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Jim Shepherd
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« Reply #22 on: March 15, 2011, 10:10:50 AM »

From a father with three daughters. Our thoughts and prayers go out to our good friends.

Bob and Karen
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« Reply #23 on: March 15, 2011, 11:34:05 AM »

I was just being pragmatic so I can take being blasted. If you want to wear a ribbon and give money to the cancer society go ahead. I just wonder how much of the money goes toward actual research that's all.

That isn't a bad question.  It is a bad question to leave out there hanging as tho the answer will be bad or that there is no answer.  For example..."I just wonder what the heXX you are trying to do by asking that question?  See how that works?  It is an accusatory question.  Implies that you are trying to do something with identifying what that might be and implying that it is subversive.  That's negative behavior.

I have friends that wouldn't donate a dime to charity despite their being staunch Christians.  That aspect of their role in society isn't why we are friends and is contradicted in their personal relations.  And they maintain that their views are compatible with their religion in disregard of charity being an obligation.  Lot of talk about prayer here and that is more than just appropriate.

I was the Campaign Chairman(effectively) for the Combined Federal Campaign at our command. That was a couple hundred man hours and flak so my money is where my mouth is.  If you want to know how much of every dollar you contribute goes to fund raising and what the total spent for that might be it is public information.  Law says you have to publish that data.  Go to the CFC web site to start your search.  Don't just sit there and announce that monies are paid to professional fund raisers as though that were a well kept secret and a disgrace.  That is simple minded.  How would you know about the Shriner's hospital or the American Cancer Society if some entity wasn't advertising and marketing their existence?  Some of these places have an overhead of over 90% and that certainly should be addressed but they are so few that to bring them up in a conversation of the merits of charity is deceitful and creats the wrong impression.  You might be interested to learn what family of charities those big spenders fall into.

"Pragmatic" is defined as "relating to matters of practical affairs at the exclusion of intellectual.....".  I read that as "without any deep thinking or intelligent investigation".  I am often operating in a pragmatic mode but to say that I am a pragmatic person would be self depreciating.

It isn't that you don't participate, its that you advocate not doing so.  Both are your prerogative but you invite the question of "why".  How do we, as a society, benefit from following your example.  How is there anything positive coming from you practice? I am not picking on you but I want to understand your actions so long as you brought them up and I want to understand your seeming dismissal of the charity of others.  Not flaming or slamming.  Just why?

John
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« Reply #24 on: March 15, 2011, 12:55:27 PM »

I must second the sentiment of this thread.  In June, I had the sad task of arranging hospice care for and then the funeral of my oldest sister at age 46.  She left behind two grown boys, a 7-year-old daughter, and her first grandbaby (who she got to see twice before she died.)  She was diagnosed with breast cancer 5 years prior and did the initial treatment (chemo/surgery) but then did not maintain her follow-up care.  When it returned, she got tied up with a prosperity/health religious group who convinced her God had healed her so she did not need to seek treatment.  She ignored numerous symptoms over the course of a year (because she didn't want to show a "lack of faith") until the tumors in her brain were impairing her motor skills, but by then it was too late.  Her "church" cut her off because she was dying and her church member "friend" kicked her out of their shared apartment.  I had to find an apartment for her and my parents came and we took care of her for the last six weeks of her life.  I would not wish that on my worst enemy...

PLEASE, ladies, get checked and FOLLOW-UP...
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« Reply #25 on: March 15, 2011, 01:07:46 PM »

No problem and a good valid question. Even if you were flaming me, I would be fine with it too as I have been accused of being narrow minded before. Like I stated. I am praying for this fellows daughter and I hope she lives another 42 or more years. I'm 46 so I would not be exempt from illness either. I just have a belief in charity beginning at home and then my church(WELS) but no further. You are correct that such charities must disclose where the money is going in a particular purpose. But that doesn't mean that they may be (with the best heart) just reinventing the wheel in actual research. I don't want the ribbon people to make me or anyone else to be made to feel guilty other wise why wear the ribbon? The MARCH OF DIMES sends me mail with dimes enclosed. If they really need the money, then why are they sending me money? Like I said, you are free to give your money and/or time to whomever you want and I would fight for your right to do so.
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« Reply #26 on: March 15, 2011, 01:30:37 PM »

Here we go the very thing Jim asked not to happen
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« Reply #27 on: March 15, 2011, 03:21:27 PM »

Since this thread is going exactly where Jim requested it not to go, it is now locked and may be moved pending review of the moderators. Jack
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